Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Weeeee Wednesday.

I got a lot done on Tuesday and got a nap in so, all in all, that was not so bad. Went to bed somewhat early last night. Jay was being cranky and snappish, the bed was the safest option. I knocked out really easy considering, but then again I was still super tired so. 
 Since it has gotten really cold at night we let our two outside cats come in at night. For some weird reason my daughter's haughty cat decided she had to cuddle with me on the bed. It was odd since this cat normally has nothing to do with me at all. Plus my kitten always sleeps with me. I never would have guessed that when I was in my 30's I would be sharing a bed with a couple cats and the husband. Then, for the first time since I woke up, Jonah had a nightmare and got on my bed. Now I have a king size bed, it is really big, and should in theory be big enough for a couple cats, a kid, Jay and I. It was to an extent, the cats went to their separate corners, curled up and went to sleep. Jonah had to be under me all night. Hence today by back is screaming at me, I am in total knots from shoulders down to hips. 
 I am still annoyed that my router is going out, it works when it wants to and that bugs the snot out of me. I also found myself being annoyed with the children big time yesterday. I am chalking it up to I did not and do not feel well, but for some reason yesterday Jonah had to bump and touch or coincidentally hit me all day long.  He never did it out of meanness but it hurt all the same. I think the one thing I hate above all else with Fibromyalgia is some days I can not be touched. What I mean is, yes it is ok to hug me but I have to know in advance so that I can steel myself for the reaction my body will have. Said reaction will be severely worse if it is unexpected.  On the really bad days I have found that it is not a good idea to go around others, since I was such a friendly person, everyone knows me and sometimes they reach out to touch me, say on a shoulder or what ever, and that unexpected contact can rock me to the very core. It makes me angry and sad. I hate this, and I am praying, hoping that I will find a way to cope better. The older kids understand, and I have found myself reacting subconsciously to possibility of being hurt.. I will tense when ever anyone gets close to me..... or flinch. Trust me this is NO way to live. *shakes head*
 So here we are at WEEEeee Wednesday. There are somethings that I want to get done, somethings I have to get done and somethings that will never get done. Yay, let's hear it for Wednesday. I am not in a bad mood, even considering the rough night I had :) so I am ready to rock this day and I am sure it will get better and better.

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